I’m really surprised at how easily I slipped into motherhood. I was deathly afraid that it was one of those things I just wasn’t cut out for. I’ve never been happier to be wrong.
The child has burrowed into my neck. I don’t know how this has happened since she has no body coordination yet. As long as she’s comfy, I guess..
My milk is coming in and my boobs are HUGE.
The first post partum bowel movement feels like you’re having a kid through your ass. Take a laxative or drink some coffee. This shit is not fun, literally.
violetandme replied to your post: The first post partum bowel movement feels like…
I didn’t eat because I didn’t want to crap … this went on for 2 months. I had never been more constipated in my life. :’(
I was told it was going to be rough, so I was terrified of pottying. I’ve always had a messed up stomach, so um, trips to the bathroom haven’t always been pleasant. But this was just ridiculous. It felt like I was having contractions in my ass again. (Yes, I felt my contractions in my ass.) I stopped midpoop & drank two cups of coffee. I highly recommend it. And using flushable wipes (or baby wipes if you don’t care about putting your poop in the trash) is a really good idea. I also used the numbing spray from the hospital throughout the whole ordeal so I didn’t feel like I was going to mess up my stitches, because even though it’s highly unlikely, it will still feel like you’re fucking shit up. For all you mama-to-be’s, I recommend drinking & eating things that get you going the day after labor. It will make it SO MUCH EASIER.
My kid is fucking perfect. You will think the sun shines out of your children’s poop-covered ass. Being a parent is amazing, and I wish all you newbies the best of luck.
I’m trying to get Lily accustomed to falling asleep without a bottle or a pacifier. I think she already knows what’s up. She’s currently laying on my chest and peeks at me with one eye every few minutes., as if to say “oh, good you’re still here!”
PS, she just smirked at me. Who gives a fuck that it was just gas?
Why yes, I did just deliver a child a week ago.
My poor baby was born with a mullet and a trucker hat.
Lily sneezed last night and scared herself awake.
She continued sneezing for nearly ten minutes. It was hilarious the first 30 seconds until I realized she was absolutely miserable. Poor baby.
Happy one week, beautiful baby girl!
Its too early for this, mom!
